Feeling Out of Whack (whatever “whack” is)

I’m learning that how you feel about how you look gets pretty much thrown out the window when you’re wearing a cast. Oh, I know, there are those who would accessorize it and make it so adorable. What I’m talking about is how you feel while wearing it.

Imagine, my haute couture of this past Sunday. The church I’m part of is not concerned with the way one looks. We just want you to be covered. While I have heard of a church that worships in the nude, ours is not that one. With that in mind, I never worried about how I would look, I just pulled on a pair of denim shorts and donned a t-shirt. I pulled a sock on my left foot and slipped my Asics sneaker on. The right foot needed no sock or shoe, the cast takes care of that.

However.

The feeling.

Left leg feels the sunshine or the breeze, right leg feels like it’s wearing a heavy winter boot with extra socks bundled up inside. Left leg is light as air. Right leg is dragging an anchor (not that I’m actually walking on it, Dr. Pesut, I promise!)

But the feeling.

Something feels out of whack.

Kinda like other areas of life can feel sometimes. Nothing’s working right, nothing fits, nothing is normal. I’m there right now, too. This past two weeks have been a roller coaster of activity (or lack thereof) and emotions. Focus has been nearly impossible and so, I have literally not tried.

I haven’t tried writing much. I haven’t tried reading much. I haven’t tried cracking my Bible much. And so…

The feeling. It’s not a feeling of being judged. It’s not a matter of thinking God loves me less.

It’s just that something feels out of whack.

Anyone else?

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